A Journey of Enthusiastic Persistance

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Once upon a time, in a quaint village nestled between rolling hills, lived a young and aspiring inventor named Mia. Mia was known throughout the village for her boundless enthusiasm and her insatiable curiosity about the world around her. From an early age, Mia had a dream—to invent something that would make life easier for everyone in the village. She started by attempting to create a water-powered contraption to carry heavy loads, but her initial designs were met with failure. Undeterred, Mia tinkered, adjusted, and tried again, learning from each setback. As the years went by, Mia's workshop became a hub of activity. The villagers watched as Mia's experiments sometimes resulted in small explosions or amusing mishaps, but her enthusiasm never waned. She faced failure after failure, yet her optimism remained unshaken. One day, the village announced a grand innovation fair, inviting inventors from neighboring towns to showcase their creations. Mia was determined to seize this o

You can Win -- {Chapter 8} Values and Vision

Chapter 8

Values and VIsion

[ Doing the Right Thing for the Right reason ]

In our life values are so important because they help us to grow and develop. They help us to create the future we want to experience. Our values reflect what is important to us in life. Values guide our behavior in all aspects of our life, including our home life, our work life, and our social life. Values are important because they can help us to predict each other's choices, and can help us avoid misunderstanding, frustration, and district. 

How Do We Judge Our Value System?

How do we put our value system to the test? I believe there are only two tests. The ultimate test is called the Mama Test. Whenever you are doing, whatever you are doing, wherever and with whomever, at home or at work, alone or with someone, if values are in question, ask yourself, "If my mama were to see me doing what I am doing right now, would she be proud of me and say "Attaboy!" or would she hang her head in shame?" Your values would be clarified rather quickly. If you passed the Mama Test and failed all other tests, you have passed. If you failed the Mama Test and passed all other tests, you have failed. 
     This is worth repeating. Think about it. Whenever you need value clarification, ask yourself, "If my mama were to see me doing whatever I am doing would she be proud of me and say "Attaboy!" or would she hang her head in shame?" The clouds will clear rather quickly and you will get your answers easily. 
If the Mama Test doesn't do it, I have another test called the Baba Test. Whenever you are doing, whatever you are doing, wherever and with whomever, at home or at work, alone or with someone, if values are in question, ask yourself, "If my children were to see me doing what I am doing right now, would I want them to see it, or would I be embarrassed?" Again the clouds will clear rather quickly and you will get your answers. If these two tests don't clarify a person's values, then that person is no longer a human being and has no conscience left. 
 
There are some benefits of identifying your value;
  • Values help you find your purpose. 
  • Values help you react in different situations.
  • Values help you make decisions.
  • Values help clear our clutter.
  • Values help you to choose the right career.
  • Values help you develop a sense of self.
  • Values help increase your confidence. 
  • Values help your overall happiness level.

What we  do for a Living Versus What we do with a Living

Hard work teaches a person the value of money. That is why it is important that parents teach their children this lesson. People who have values have no price tag and neither do they value themselves. But nowadays this younger generation who inherits money without value. Money is not that payoff for every kind of work. Parents bring up the children with no paycheck in mind.
The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched. They must be felt with the heart. --Helen Keller
It is good to have money and the things it can buy, but in the process of acquiring money, we don't want to lose the things that money cant buy. Money can only buy what money can buy. And in fact, the most precious things are those that money just can't buy.

What money won't buy

We learn from the above paragraph that money just can't buy. People with character, integrity, and the right values are not for sale. Money will buy:
  • Amusements but not happiness.
  • A bed but not sleep.
  • Books but not wisdom.
  • A clock but not more time.
  • Companions bot not friends.
  • Finery but not beauty.
  • Food but not appetite.
  • A house but not a home.
  • Medicine but not health.
  • A ring but not health.
  • A ring but not a marriage.

The MIDAS touch


We all know the story of the greedy king named Midas. He had a lot of gold and the more he had the more he wanted. He stored all the gold in his vaults and used to spend time every day counting it. One day while he was counting a stranger came from nowhere and said he would grant him a wish. The king was delighted and said, "I would like everything I touch to turn to gold." The stranger asked the king, Are you sure?" The king replied, "Yes." So the stranger said, "Starting tomorrow morning with the sun rays you will get the golden touch." 
The king thought he must be dreaming, this couldn't be true. But the next day when he woke up, he touched the bed, his clothes, and everything turned to gold. He looked out of the window and saw his daughter playing in the garden. He decided to give her a surprise and thought she would be happy. But before he went to the garden he decided to read a book. The moment he touched it, it turned into gold and he couldn't read it. Then he sat to have breakfast and the moment he touched the fruit and the glass of water, they turned to gold. He was getting hungry and he said to himself, "I can't eat and drink gold." Just about that time his daughter came running and he hugged her and she turned into a gold statue. There were no more smiles left. 
The king bowed his head and started crying. The stranger who gave the wish came again and asked the king if he was happy with his golden touch. The king said he was the most miserable man. The stranger asked, "What would you rather have, your food and loving daughter or lumps of gold and her golden statue?" The king cried and asked for forgiveness. He said, "I will give up all my gold. Please give me my daughter back because without her I have lost everything worth having." The stranger said to the king, "You have become wiser than before" and he reversed the spell. He got his daughter back in his arms and the king learned a lesson that he never forget for the rest of his life. 

What is the moral of the story?

DIstorted values lead to tragedy.
Sometimes getting what you want may be a bigger tragedy than not getting what you want.
Unlike the game of soccer where players can be substituted, the game of life allows no substitutions or replays. We may not get a second chance to reserve our tragedies, as the king did.

Is your life worth saving?

A boy was drowning in a river and he shouted for help. A man passing by jumped in the river and saved the boy's life. As the man was leaving the boy said, Thank-you.'' The man asked, "For what?" The boy replied, "For saving my life." The man looked into the boy's eyes and said, Upon, make sure when you grow up that your life was worth saving." 

      It is time to think. This is a wake-up call. Success without fulfillment is meaningless. Unless there is a sense of meaning and purpose, life is empty and unhappy regardless of how much prestige, money or degrees a person has. 
Success begins with developing your personal success philosophy, about your health, money, family, society, and values. Without a clearly defined purpose and a philosophy to guide you, life is guided by fantasies. If people have not defined a philosophy of success, they have actually defined a philosophy of failure by default. 
Sometimes we overlook the things that ought not to be overlooked and don't overlook the things that ought to be overlooked. 
An integral part of a good value system is a commitment.

Commitment


To make commitments upon our dream we have to clear our decision an value.
Example; You can't make a commitment to your country by selling secrets to the enemy. You can't keep a friend by revealing to others what he told you in confidence. You can't keep a commitment to a job by trying to do as little as possible. Unkept commitments result in dishonest behavior. I wonder how any relationship, regardless of whether personal or professional, would work if people said something to the effect. 

¨ I will try but I can't commit. 
¨ I will do it but don't count on me. 
¨ I will be there if I can, but don't get your hopes up. 
¨ I will be there, so long as you do well. 
¨ I will be there so long as you are in good health. 
¨ I will stick with you till I find something better.

Our strongest relationships are tied together with the invisible something called commitment. Lack of commitment would destabilize relationships and lead to insecurity. No one would know where they stand with each other.

Commitment implies:
  1. Dependability
  2. Reliability
  3. Predictability
  4. Consistency
  5. Caring
  6. Empathy
  7. A sense of duty
  8. Sincerity
  9. Character
  10. Integrity
  11. Loyalty
If one of those ingredients is missing, commitment loses strength. When a person makes a commitment to someone, he is really saying, "You can count on me no matter what," and "I will be there when you need me." Which increases the value of that person who gives commitment.

Regardless of the uncertainty, commitment says "You can count on me." A person who makes a commitment is willing to give up a lot. For what? The answer is pretty clear. The rewards can be priceless. Commitment says: 
  1. I am willing to sacrifice because I care. 
  2. I am a person of integrity and you can trust me. 
  3. I will not let you down. 
  4. Despite the pain, I will still be there. 
  5. I will not let you down in good times or in bad times.
Remember and keep in mind, needs are stronger than wants. Commitments act as a glue that bonds relationships. Commitment implies sacrificing fun and willingness to accept sorrow. Commitment is a sign of maturity. Commitment means not quitting at the first option or sign of problems. Individuals with strong commitments build strong communities. 
        Many people are not willing to make commitments because they feel they are not ready for it. However, in the meantime, for years they keep sharing and using anything and everything of one another. Relationships don't last because of passion and love but because of commitments and empathy. A commitment implies putting the other person's needs ahead of one's own.

Commitment to Values

Loyalty cannot be bought, they are earned. When a person makes a commitment of loyalty to either ab individual or an organization what really he saying? He is saying "I stand by you because I believe in what you believe in."  What if the person I am committed to, be it a leader, spouse, employer, employee becomes a spy for an enemy country? Do I continue my support because I committed earlier? Absolutely not. I am not committed to support unethical and illegal behavior. 
Unkept commitments lead to: 
¨ Broken homes 
¨ Abandoned children 
¨ Poor relationships 
¨ High-stress levels 
¨ Guilt 
¨ Unfulfilled life 
¨ Loss of business 
¨ Isolation 
¨ Depression 

Make a commitment and stay committed! 

Ethics

     Bad circumstances are not excuses for making bad choices and leading poor lives. Values and ethics are not just designed for good times, but also to prevent bad times. They are like the laws of the land which you need when people are good and you need even more to protect them from the bad. Ethical choices reflect objectivity between right and wrong. That is why our conscience hurts when making an unethical choice and does not hurt when making a wrong personal choice. Choices are personal because the person makes it, but the rightness or wrongness does not change from person to person. Just like in a math test.
        Those who believe that ethics cannot be generalized but vary with every situation, come up with justification and keep changing their ethics from situation to situation, and person to person. This is called situational ethics. This is the ethics of conveniences rather than conviction.

Purpose of Life

There are many kinds of desire. Desire for success, desire to do one's duty even at the cost of pleasure. Desire for purpose. Something worth dying for which gives meaning to life. A purposeless life is a living death What is the purpose? Do you have one? 
Purpose brings passion. Find or create a purpose and then pursue it with passion and perseverance. Every day we need to ask ourselves the question: 
"Am I getting any closer to my purpose in life? 
Am I making this a better place to live?"
 If the answer is no, then I have just wasted a day of my life.

The earlier we find a purpose in life, the better it is. It appears that the greatest challenge comes in the unending search for the purpose of life. Not only as an individual but for our families, organizations, and country. Once our purpose and values are clear, conflicts between self-interest and social obligations find a moral balance between themselves. We become aware of when to take a stand. That is the time we start making the right decisions for long-term gain rather than making the wrong decisions for short-term gain. Wisdom and maturity lead to a greater understanding of major issues. 

Study as if you were to live forever. Live as if you were to die tomorrow. 
-- Mahatma Gandhi

Living with a Purpose

All of us are put on this planet for a purpose. We are part of a big picture. But very few people discover their purpose in life. Most of us just exist and keep counting our days rather than making our days count. 
Dr. Albert Einstein was once asked, "Why are we here?" He replied, "If the universe is an accident, we are accidents. But if there is meaning in the universe, there is meaning in us also." And he added, "The more I study physics, the more I am drawn towards metaphysics." 
I would rather fail in a cause that will ultimately succeed than succeed in a cause that would ultimately fail. 
--Wood row Wilson
We learn our values from our parents and teachers. If we do not learn values from our parents and teachers, who do we learn them from? And when they don't teach us values, we pick them up by default from television and other such undesirable sources. No wonder society gets messed up. The teacher such as in the example above is not only irresponsible with distorted values but does not deserve to be teaching our kids. 

Winning versus Winners

What is the difference between winning and being a winner? Winning is an event. Being a winner is a spirit. Winners have kept winning in perspective based on their value system. Winners are gracious. They never brag about themselves, they respect and appreciate their team members and opponents. Many people know how to succeed. Very few know how to handle success. And there is always something about success that displeases some other people.

     The reality is that life is a competition and we have to compete. In fact, competition makes competitive people grow. The objective is to win, no question hut to win fairly, squarely, decently, and by the rules.

Try not to be a man of success but rather try to be a man of value. 
--Albert Einstein 

What is Goodness?

If we took a survey, asking people one question, "Are you good?" most people would respond, "Yes!" Ask them, "What makes you good?" Responses will be: 
¨ I don't cheat so I'm good. 
¨ I don't lie so that makes me good. 
¨ I don't steal, so I'm good. 
      If you analyze the above rationales, there is not much substance in them. Just think of the person who says, "I don't cheat." Well, that only means that he is not a cheat. And the persons who say they don't lie and steal, only mean that they are not liars and thieves. But that doesn't make them good. A person becomes good when he actually does good rather than not doing wrong. A person of values would be one who has qualities such as fairness, compassion, courage, integrity, empathy, humility, loyalty, and courtesy. What Page 174 of 175 makes a person with these qualities a good person? It is because these are the kind of people who are dependable, stand up for justice, help the needy, make life better for themselves and those around them. To recognize goodness in all its forms, we need benchmarks and standards. Benchmarks can be ethical, or legal, or both. Ethical ones deal with right and wrong and all the gray areas that are in between leading to what is good and better and what is bad and worse.

How high are Ethical Standards?

What would you do in the following situations? 
  1. You know the taxi fare from your home to the airport is $64. You have paid it before, you know it is the correct fare. This time the taxi driver asks for $3
  2. What would you do? 2. You are dining in a restaurant and you ordered four dishes and the waiter brought all four but by mistake, billed you for only three. What would you do? 
  3. Your best friend is terminally ill and you are a life assurance salesman. They needed $100,000 worth of insurance. No one knows and no one can find out that your friend is dying. Would you write the policy? 
You cannot legislate ethics. What advice would you give to your children under the same circumstances? Is your behavior conforming with the advice you would give your children in the same situation? We start learning ethics right after birth and all through our lives. Can we change ethical behavior? Yes, we need ethical training. 

Ethics in Business

When we cheat the people around us, most of all we are cheating ourselves. We are preparing ourselves to be cheated. Prosperity brings responsibility. We cannot build industry and infrastructure while destroying the moral and social fiber.
The consequences of not following ethical behavior are the same as not following legal behavior. Some people will never be ethical. They think they are taking the easy way. In reality it is the tougher way. Could you face yourself if you didn't do the right thing for your client? Could you brag to your kids and be proud and feel good? If you can't, then that behavior is unethical. 
A sense of humor and pride in oneself keeps a person on course. 

Vision

Why don't people achieve excellence? The big reason is the lack of vision or limited vision. We need to dream beyond what is possible. Everything that we see today was a dream before it became a reality. Live with enthusiasm, direction, and with a sense of purpose. Do you have a dream? What is your dream? Every day that you live, are you getting closer to your purpose? Get your advice from successful people and not from living failures who will tell you how to succeed. 

Where the vision is one year, cultivate flowers. 
Where the vision is ten years, cultivate trees. 
Where the vision is eternity, cultivate people.

 Remember, winners don't do different things, they do things differently!

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So guys this all summary about YOU CAN WIN book. 

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